HEAVENLY MANNA

    The Bulwar-Lytton prize (named for the author of the opening line, "It was a dark and stormy night...") is awarded every year to some of the worst possible opening lines of a book.  Here are some samples of past winners: "Just beyond the Narrows the river widens." "With a curvaceous figure that Venus would have envied, a tanned, unblemished oval face framed with lustrous thick brown hair, deep azure-blue eyes fringed with long black lashes, perfect teeth that vied for competition, and a small straight nose, Marilee had a beauty that defied description." "Detective Kodiak plucked a single hair from the bearskin rug and at once understood the grisly nature of the crime: it had been a ferocious act, a real honey, the sort of thing that could polarize a community, so he padded quietly out the back to avoid a cub reporter waiting in the den." (you'll want to read this one again.....slowly and carefully!) "Stanley looke...

  I've frequently visited the beaches on the East coast with my family. Oh,   we love them! One visit, it wasn't just another day with the family at the   beach. No. No, see, the lifeguards at Ocean City, N.J. suddenly made   everyone get out of the water - fast! And you know what I'm thinking. I'm   thinking "Jaws"! So I was really cooperative. I got out real fast! Well,   instead, it was all about these two children, and they had to plunge in   and rescue them because they were in trouble out by a jetty there.   And then there are those times when you just can't wait for the big guys   to get there. That's what happened with 12-year-old Nicole Kissel who was   boogie boarding about five months ago on Washington's Long Beach. And   suddenly she heard somebody screaming near her, "Help! Help!" It turned   out it was another 12-year-old. It was 7th grader Dale Ostrander. He was   there that day with his youth...

The sheep listen to the voice of the shepherd. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. —John 10:3 WHEN I SEE a flock of sheep I see exactly that, a flock. A rabble of wool. A herd of hooves. I don’t see a sheep. I see sheep. All alike. None different. That’s what I see. But not so with the shepherd. To him every sheep is different. Every face is special. Every face has a story. And every sheep has a name. The one with the sad eyes, that’s Droopy. And the fellow with one ear up and the other down, I call him Oscar. And the small one with the black patch on his leg, he’s an orphan with no brothers. I call him Joseph. The shepherd knows his sheep. He calls them by name. When we see a crowd, we see exactly that, a crowd. Filling a stadium or flooding a mall. When we see a crowd, we see people, not persons, but people. A herd of humans. A flock of faces. That’s what we see. But not so with the Shepherd. To him every face is different. Every face is a story. E...

            A long dusty road into Bethlehem town,                 nowhere to stay but a stall,          A baby of hope wrapped in swaddling clothes,                could He be the Lord over all?         The ancient writings foretold the newborn King!     And love came, Jesus Messiah, the Savior, born as a child.                His love, His love came down.   Love came, Light of the nations, He gave his gift of salvation                His love, His love came down.          While under the sky in the darkest of night              shepherds were tending their sheep      An angel appeared with the heavenly host proclaiming         ...

What happens when a dog interrupts a concert? To answer that, come with me to a spring night in Lawrence, Kansas. Take your seat in Hoch Auditorium and behold the Leipzig Gewandhaus Orchestra—the oldest continually operating orchestra in the world. The greatest composers and conductors in history have directed this orchestra. It was playing in the days of Beethoven (some of the musicians have been replaced). You watch as stately dressed Europeans take their seats on the stage. You listen as professionals carefully tune their instruments. The percussionist puts her ear to the kettle drum. A violinist plucks the nylon sting. A clarinet player tightens the reed. And you sit a bit straighter as the lights dim and the tuning stops. The music is about to begin. The conductor, dressed in tails, strides onto the stage, springs onto the podium, and gestures for the orchestra to rise. You and two thousand others applaud. The musicians take their seats, the maestro takes his ...

    "We were closer when we were poorer." The lady who told me that was   speaking about her marriage, and she wasn't poor any more. You could tell   that by looking at her. She was very affluent. But she was telling me that   she and her husband were closer in the early days of their relationship   when they were pinching pennies, and scraping by, and wondering how they   were going to pay the rent, and fighting the wolf at the door. But they   were at least fighting the wolf together.   Now, since that conversation with that lady I've had many opportunities to   quote her at, oh, women's luncheons and dinners. And I always see women's   head nodding in agreement as if that's been the case in their life too.   Apparently there's something about not having much that can make a   relationship stronger.   I'm Oluwafemi Olawale and I want to have A Word With You today about "Very   Needy, Very Close...

  You may have heard about the following new units of measure and conversions: Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter: Eskimo Pi 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University hospital:  1 I.V. League Speed of a tortoise breaking the sound barrier:  Mach Turtle Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour:  Knot-furlong Basic unit of laryngitis:  1 hoarsepower Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement:  bananosecond 1 million microphones = 1 megaphone 2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds 10 cards = 1 decacards 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche 453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake 3-1/3 tridents = 1 decadent 8 nickels = 2 paradigms 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon 1000 aches = 1 megahurtz 2 wharves = 1 paradox 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton      Some interesting conversions!  But...